Distance
by Babelvr54
Summary: Stephanie comes clean about her feelings, Ranger runs. Babe HEA, Helen is kinda abused and no morelli


**Distance**

I hadn't seen Ranger for about ten months. I finally came clean about my feelings and he walked out my door, straight to his Miami office. I cried for about 2 days and then got up, put on some clean clothes and decided to get some training.

I had a bit of money to take about two months off, and so I did. In that time I got all the training I needed. I took five mile runs every morning, learnt types of self-defence and finally learned how to use my gun.

When I brought my first ten skips without get a smidge of dirt on me the cops at TPD were surprised, so were the two Rangemen watching me bring in my skips. I kept up with my training and kept on getting better, and richer. Vinnie started giving me higher levels of skips, all of which I brought in successfully. I now have a nice nest saved up.

Whilst my professional life was getting better, my personal life, not so much. I haven't seen my mother in five months; I stopped returning her calls four months ago. There was no chance in hell I was getting back together with Joe. I missed Ranger.

I tried to keep busy doing other things, my calendar was always full. I now knew the entire deep down private stuff about the merry men, I occasionally helped out at the office doing searches (and not because I needed money), but I still missed Ranger. Apparently the Miami office was not faring too well because Tank kept getting calls about Ranger being impossible to deal with.

The guys finally persuaded me to get a new apartment with better security, and so I did. I tried going out on a few dates, but they all ended with me missing Ranger even more, so I stopped.

I was trying to sleep when I got a phone call. "Steph, hurry I'm waiting downstairs, hurry, Ranger's been in a car crash."

It took me a moment to realise what had happened. I flew downstairs and slipped into the waiting SUV.

They were operating on him when we reached the hospital. "What was he doing here big guy?" I asked Tank.

"I don't know, he didn't tell me that he was coming over, I don't think the Miami men knew either. They would've told me"

I felt strangely distant from the whole incident. I love him. He doesn't love me. I suddenly felt sick. I didn't want to feel like my entire life was going to end if he didn't survive. At this point I wished I didn't know him. I wish I never met him. He was sitting there in Miami, healthy and whole and then he comes back, just when I'm getting used to being alone. Just like Ranger, disrupting my life and then going back to pretending that I didn't matter.

I shouldn't be here I thought. He probably wouldn't want to see me. I'm wasting my time and tears after someone who doesn't care about my existence. I was just about to leave when a nurse came into the waiting room. "Ms. Stephanie plum?" she called out.

"That's me" I acknowledged

"You're listed as his 'next of kin', we need you to sign some forms. Please come with me." I followed her, dumbfounded, to an office. She gave me a bunch of papers to sign and fill out. Absentmindedly I filled out the forms. 'Why would he list me as his next of kin?'

XXOXXXOXX

**10 hours later**

They told us that he was out of surgery and in his room. He should be conscious in about an hour, and fully recovered in a week. He was okay. He will be fine. I didn't realise how tense I had been until my body relaxed. Then I once again realised that I was unwanted here. Silently, while the men were lining up to check on Ranger, I stepped into the waiting elevator and left. Seeing him would be too painful and I already had enough pain in my life.

I got into a waiting taxi outside the hospital when my phone rang.

"Stephanie Plum, where are you" asked Tank's throaty voice.

"I'm not feeling very well, I'm going to go home and get some sleep."

"Bullshit! You get your arse back here or I'm going to drag you back here kicking and screaming. You waited for him to recover for ten hours and now you leave."

"Tank, you don't know what happened, so please don't talk to me like that. This thing is not my fault. I do have some pride. I begged once and he left, I'm not going to do it again." I cut off the phone and for the first time in ten months, I cried.

XXOXXXOXX

**Three weeks later**

I knew he was still in town because I knew that the moment he left I would be able to breathe properly again, without the constant fear of fainting or bursting onto tears. My skips were now afraid of me and came in peace (one of them brought me a dozen donoughts to keep the peace). My capture was getting better than ever before.

I came home that evening to find my apartment door unlocked and Ranger sleeping on my couch. That asshole, I do not want to hear anything from him, he made his choice and now he can live with the consequences. I called my security company – Rangeman and waited outside.

Five minutes later, Bobby and Tank burst out of the stairwell and came towards me, panic written all over their faces. "Arrest him for breaking and entering" I motioned toward my apartment.

The opened the door and went in SWAT style.

"Hands up in the air!" heard Bobby shout.

"Boss-man!" from Tank.

I walked in. "Cuff him!"

"Babe" you can guess who that is.

Tank, Bobby and Ranger stared at me as if I had grown a second head.

"What are you looking at, you're my security company and I have an intruder in my home. Arrest him."

They looked at Ranger who had a really sad expression on his face.

"Steph, I just want to talk to you."

"You should have done that ten months ago Ranger. Leave and I won't press charges. Don't come back. I don't want to play your games anymore." I said in a level voice.

Then I made the mistake of looking at him, really looking at him. He had a cast on his right hand and some bandage around his thighs. He had dark circles, which as far as I know are not the side-effect of any of his medications.

He walked over to me, careful of his injuries. "Babe, please just listen to me."

"Fine, talk." I stated flatly

"I understand and accept that I was stupid ten months ago. I was scared babe, but I'm not anymore. I can't live without you, I don't want to live without you anymore. I love you and I'm sorry for what I did to you. Will you take me back babe?"

"No, you can leave now." With that I walked off to my bedroom. I didn't want to see on his face what I felt those ten months ago. I want to move on. I want someone who respects me and doesn't change their mind like people change clothes. He didn't care how I felt, he didn't care that he was crushing my heart.

I changed into my pyjamas and walked out into the living room to find Ranger, Tank and Bobby in an intense discussion about whatever superheros talk about. I wouldn't know and I realised that I would never find out.

He didn't leave.

I packed a bag with two days' worth of clothes and my other necessities and some money and quietly walked out the door. They would see me on the cameras and know that I left of my own free will. Ranger wouldn't care.

I waited for a cab, knowing that they would have tracking devices on my car, and went off to a five star motel, and paid money for two nights. Luckily their system was down, so they were taking names and accepted cash.

I lay in my hotel room wondering if he actually loved me. Stop it Steph, he would've come to you sooner if he actually cared. Move on.

XXOXXXOXX

**Two days later**

I walked back into my apartment and felt a sense of déjà vu settle over me. Ranger was once again laying on my couch, but he was awake this time. He was staring at my ceiling and completely not aware of his surroundings, at closer inspection I realised that his eyes seemed hollow, as if he hadn't been taking proper care of himself.

_Flashback_

_It was after a distraction and this skip had been a bit too handsy. I needed a shower really bad. Ranger did his search through my apartment for killer dust bunnies and ninja assassins, while I waited. _

_After his search, I went straight to the shower, wanting to get the gross skip germs off me. When I came back out Ranger was lying on my bed, asleep. In that moment I fell more in love with him than ever before. "I love you" I whispered_

_I realised my mistake when his eyes shot open, he looked at me in shock and jumped off the bed. He almost ran out the door._

"_Wait! Please Ranger, do you love me?"_

"_Look Steph, you know I can't commit to a relationship. There's too much uncertainty. I can't be what you need."_

"_You don't know what I need. I need you."_

_He didn't answer, didn't look back, just walked out the door and out of my life_

_Flashback_

"Babe, you're back." I realised he was looking at me.

"Ranger, don't you have better things to do than lie on my couch all day?"

He stood up and I realised that he hadn't left my apartment at all. He was wearing the same clothes he was wearing the last time I saw him.

"I couldn't leave, in case you came back and left." He fell down to his knees.

"Steph, I'm the stupidest man when it comes to women and relationships, but I love you and will love you with all that I am. I've been stupid, but please let me atone for my sins babe, please let me show you how much I love you. I admit I was scared; I was scared of what I felt for you. But the minute I boarded that plane I realised the mistake I had made. Then I was embarrassed and afraid that you wouldn't take me back, so I stayed away, but I couldn't. I couldn't stop thinking about you, I couldn't sleep, eat, work without you haunting my thoughts babe. Please accept me, I'll do whatever you want me to do to earn back your trust, but please don't leave me." He was crying by the end of his little speech, and I for once was speechless.

I fell down on my knees in front of him. "What if I told you that even after all this I still love you?" I asked, still afraid of his answer.

"If you told me that you still loved me after all my stupidness, I would think that I am the luckiest man on this planet." He answered back, his eyes so hopeful

"I am scared, the last time I did that you left me."

"I won't leave this time."

My eyes decided that this was the right time to start the water works, so my face was now had a distinct resemblance to Niagara Falls. "I can't say it." And I couldn't, every time I told a man that I loved him, he either died or cheated or left me.

"I can wait, for as long as you want me."

"Okay"

"Okay"


End file.
